What is Love?

     With the Valentine's Day holiday creeping up on us, I thought I would lighten this blog up a bit.  After all, infertility isn't that much fun to talk about all the time.  So, with the title in mind, what is love?  The nerdy teacher in me will define it for you: love (n) a profound tender affection for another person.  My husband and I have been married almost 5 years, and I have never known a love could be so deep.  As I think back to when we first met, our engagement, and even our wedding day, I knew there wasn't any way humanly possible that I could love this man any more than I do now.  As usual, I was wrong. 
     We have been through an innumerable amount of tests in our marriage already.  This last bump mountain in the road really made us take a look at our relationship.  Could this major obstacle really kill our marriage?  I have read and heard about countless couples who struggle with starting a family and actually end up getting a divorce.  This breaks my heart, but as we took an even deeper look at our relationship we realized it will never be the case for us.  In fact, I feel our relationship getting stronger by the day.  That doesn't mean that it is perfect, but we were given some great advise before we were married that I want to share it with you. 
     When we were going through marriage counseling, our wise pastor gave the perfect analogy of marriage and divorce.  He said, divorce is like the hatch on a submarine, if you leave the hatch open the sub will sink.  Meaning if you go into the relationship thinking that there is a way out, then you have already set yourself up for failure.  However, if you just close the hatch (divorce isn't an option) then it doesn't matter what kind of murky or troubled waters you pass through, you will make it out alright.  Whose not to say that there won't be bumps and bruises along the way, but at least you still have each other.  It never has been an option for us, nor will it ever be. 
     Now, to the real meat of this post.  What I think love is, since we know the definition, I can tell you what love looks like to me.  It's sitting at home on a Friday night watching a movie next to a warm fire in our pajamas.  It's going camping and having it rain ALL weekend, but still having a great time anyway.  It's having your car break down on your way to Florida, and being stuck in a small garage waiting for it to get fixed while keeping each other calm the whole time.  It's watching the man you love shower love and affection on your nephews and know that he WILL make a great daddy one day.  (You thought something else didn't you, shame on you this is a family friendly blog)  It's planning our retirement and where we will go once we are retired.  It's going out to show off the man you married and wanting to say, sorry ladies he's ALL mine.  It's knowing what the other person is thinking right before they say it (which can be incredibly scary at times).  It's helping each other with the house chores because, face it, there is nothing sexier than coming home after a long day to a load of laundry that's been done or better yet the dishwasher is completely empty.  It's not having to say anything at all, yet the other person knows exactly how much you love them.  It's experiencing some of the hardest times of your life, yet knowing that with your true love by your side nothing (not even infertility) could tear you apart.  I could ramble on for hours, but I won't because you're probably already rolling your eyes.  ;)
     I know I still have a lot to learn about marriage and love, however, I have to say I think we have a pretty good start, no matter what is thrown our way.  Our profound, tender affection will last until were old, and he's gray because, let's face it, I will dye my hair until the day I die.  Happy Love Day everyone and until next time, always Chasing Hope.